Having been working as an engineer for a big company for three plus years. The pay is good. The work title is nice. When people know which company I work for, their respectful faces showed.
Which leads to a common problem people don’t say but exist almost everywhere around the world—the praise addiction.
It’s a study done by J.T. O’Donnell, the founder and CEO of Work It Daily. She spent 15 years studying why people hate their jobs but they keep doing the work. 70% of people stay in their jobs because of praise addiction.I was definitely guilty of that.
Back in 2015, I worked like 30 hours a day, i mean, it felt like 30 hours! 12+ hours(exclude commute time) and I have been I always think that I do this for myself, for a better me, for a better life, etc.
But it was not. I lied to myself that I was great at that work in terms of being able to solve problems, improving myself, blahblahblah. Yes they might all be right. But the biggest reason is I was addicted to the praise external environment gave me. Which is the dumbest thing ever.
You see, others thoughts and words are just not important. Your value is measured by you not others! They don’t know you. So why are you affected by their opinions ? Maybe they’re just jealous of you, of the things you’ve accomplished.
I wish I knew this back then. Therefore I sincerely want to share this with you. Yes I know you’re caring, you care about others and you want them happy.
The reality is you can’t make everyone happy. The very person you should make happy is yourself!
Back then, I accidentally defined my value by others thoughts and words. I tried to make everyone satisfied and happy with results. And ended up I was unhappy. And on top of that, I sacrificed time accompanying my loved ones nor I had no time to do the thing I love — traveling.
The very thing you cannot expect on your job is you or you and your loved ones spend time with each other and go traveling often. You can do that for a few times. But just those few times. twice a year? You cant take too much day offs unless you want to change your career, can you? If traveling is your passion, is what makes you happy. Then you don’t want to do that just twice a year. You want to do that twice a month!
And I’m so glad that I determined to change my life, starting to live my own life–I build my own online business while being able to do the things I love as long as I have internet and my laptop with me. (Click for more info)
However, everybody has different dream goals and desired lifestyle. Therefore I personally think the most crucial thing for each and every individual in their lives is knowing what are you working extremely hard for. Your goal, your action, your achievement…that’s what makes you special and what makes your life meaningful.
Yes you are hard-working, responsible to your job. You get up at 6a.m., preparing to go to work, drive(or bus) through insane traffic, might only have 10 minutes to eat your breakfast because there’s a meeting going to start or a task that you need to begin dealing soon after you arrive at the office.
Awesome that you completed tons of work, but the core question you should clarify before anything is, what makes you happy? what’s the thing you want to be doing everyday and the rest of your life?
You might also be interested in reading the very thing you most likely didn’t know about who you are.